{"version":"1.0","provider_name":"2022 Archive of RENATURED, Marina Zurkow's Research Blog","provider_url":"https:\/\/o-matic.com\/blog-archive-2022","author_name":"Marina","author_url":"https:\/\/o-matic.com\/blog-archive-2022\/blog\/author\/admin\/","title":"Knock Knock...","html":"Sue Morgan (one of my Donkleywood hosts and compatriots) wrote me a series of upsetting emails on Wednesday. The Greys have hit the frontline, as Donkleywood is just north of Hadrian's wall, a couple miles to Kielder Forest. Recently (I believe) few other Greys have been spotted up there... until now. I got her permission to post her emails and images here.\r\n\r\n01 July 12:40PM\r\n
Hi\r\n\r\nThis is BIG dramarama time in the world of Donkleywood Red vs Grey. I think it was a-comin' to see you.\r\n\r\nI was tippety -tapping on my laptop in the lounge when picture this I heard a thump at the window adjacent to me. I thought, oh no poor bird (sometimes the fledglings throw themselves at windows) so I jumped up with rescue in mind only to be faced with gasp!\r\n\r\nCUE DRAMATIC SOUNDTRACK\r\n\r\nCUE SCREAM\r\n\r\nENTER GREY SQUIRREL\r\n\r\nWe looked at each other. It looked at me like what are you bloody mutha ***kin' looking at - open the window. This was no time for a stand-off. I ran out got a net & ran after the critter. It made for the roof, then leapt on to the road, made a run for John's so I headed it off on the grass. Then I was stuck til John stuck his head outta the window & enquired politely was I ok? He came to the rescue with a cat box. The squirrel is now captive in the barn awaiting it's fate... I have given it some peanuts... I feel quite sad. but I know it has to die.\r\n\r\nI've covered it's prison\/box with Cal's blanket but it's a mean ol critter & it's shoutin' Zurkow! .. get me Zurkow!\r\n\r\nnext episode... Sue is newly-appointed Squirrel Catcher of Donkleywood, plus update, plus pics\r\n\r\nAnyway do you want it for stuffing? I would say it's a juvenile.\r\n\r\nx<\/blockquote>\r\n01 July 1:16PM\r\n
UPDATE\r\n\r\nI've just spoken to official Squirrel Killer Paul Parker he's coming out this afternoon to deal with (shoot) captive squirrel & to lay traps in Donkleywood. I am accompanying him on his mission, which naturally I am very excited about. You should have stayed!\r\n\r\nIs this life imitating art imitating life?\r\n\r\nI can't believe your visit is being followed by a grey invader, then Paul Parker - things are getting quite surreal.\r\n\r\nx<\/blockquote>\r\n01 July 1:30PM\r\n
I know! OMG!\r\n\r\nI do believe they're a-comin' to getcha but have no fear Paul will be here. He's arriving approx 3-4pm UK time wit his shooter. Can ya believe it knocking on the freakin' window? can ya believe me catching it? can ya believe official squirrel killer PAUL PARKER is in the house? LOL!\r\n\r\nI'm tryin' here to write a best seller but my life's bin invaded by all the excitement & a great story unfolding right before my eyes. I wish I could have caught the shot of it looking at me through the window - priceless\r\n\r\nZURKOW!.... ZURKOW!\r\n\r\nIn the film Paul shoots in the head, I presume this will mess-up any taxidermy project. Have you any suggestions? can you ask the stuffer-man?\r\n\r\nZURKOOOOW! GET ME OUTTA HERE ZURKOW!!!!!\r\n\r\nx<\/blockquote>\r\n01 July 1:48PM\r\n
I will try & fulfill your demands. I've just checked my captive - s\/he's mean & making screechy noises at me & running up & down the box\/prison will send pics later.\r\n\r\nWhere's the best part on a juvenile squirrel for a bullet hole?\r\nI have Paul's number in my mobile - I'll try & show him your website over tea & biscuits.\r\n\r\nI may hook you up... ;o)<\/blockquote>\r\n01 July 2PM\r\n
If you feel pressed, you may send it to the ether...\r\n\r\nThis storyline can only unfold upon your departure. You had to leave before the squirrels came looking for you... and allow Paul Parker the saviour to enter Donkleywood.\r\n\r\nx<\/blockquote>\r\n01 July 9:51PM\r\n
UPDATE\r\n\r\nI'm exhausted after my afternoon with Paul the verminator - crikey it's been so hot here today too hot for critter-catching. Squirrel has been dispatched. It didn't go quietly. Actually he didn't kill it. It's not ours being butchered in the pics, it's one he caught earlier. He'd been on the kill in Corbridge & Hexham today. He skinned & filleted one for my dinner. I can take a picture but I need to unwrap it.\r\n\r\nPaul's a very nice guy with many anecdotes which I love. He's very upset that the greys have come this far to Donkleywood - a skip & a hop away from Kielder. It's only a mile & a half from the Reds frontline - he's very worried & believes that it will take just one infected Grey to wipe out the whole of Kielder.\r\n\r\nThe captive Grey has to have a blood sample taken which will be sent to Bristol University for tests for the virus. Squirrel will then\u00a0 be humanely killed (shot through the head).\r\n\r\nOn a lighter note Paul cannot believe I caught it with my net, it's unheard of apparently - he thinks I should get a medal! Praise indeed...<\/blockquote>\r\n01 July 10:38PM\r\n
Poor Paul he did look kinda sad by then as we were looking out over the valley towards Kielder. He's very passionate about the Reds but he thinks it's a shame about the Greys that's why he kills them humanely, not horribly, by knocking a great big shovel over their heads.\r\n\r\nNo not eating squirrel! I had no time for protestations, he'd skinned it quick-sticks whilst I was busily taking snaps.<\/blockquote>\r\n...and here is Sue's thorough documentation. I left the edit quite long, feeling it important to spare no one - myself foremost- of the reality of the outcomes that result from deciding to cull the invader. It is gruesome.\u00a0 And honestly it's\u00a0 too complex a network of ecologi-cultural viewpoints for me to pass judgment.\r\n\r\n[gallery link=\"file\" order=\"DESC\"]","type":"rich"}